To better days...

Well, where did 2020 go? I don't need to go over the many unprecedented events the world faced this year, but suffice to say I'm feeling grateful to have made it out the other side with all of my friends and loved ones still happy and healthy.

I sat down to write this hoping that some inspirational words of positivity and wisdom would somehow spring forth from my fingertips. But I have none. I want to feel full of hope for a new chapter, and part of me does, but I also know that we don't simply leave our troubles behind at the turn of a new page. The world's problems - and our own - carry onwards, leaving me questioning the significance of an arbitrary change of numbers on a calendar, or the ticking forward of a clock. What changes, really?

All I can hope is that we carry the lessons we've learnt with us along the way. For me, that means the realisation that life is all too fleeting and precious. That happiness ought to be grabbed where we can find it. And that being grateful for what we have now doesn't mean giving up on the dreams we have for our future. Those dreams might be smaller now, granted. For me, it would be to hug loved ones I've gone far too long without seeing. To be able to see and hold my pregnant friend's baby - hopefully sometime before he's a toddler. To travel. To be back in a non-socially distanced classroom, surrounded by chaos and children and excitement. For my daughter to be able to have her first sleepover and for my son to be able to run riot at soft play. To sit on my sofa with a friend, and laugh and chat over a cup of coffee.

But I am lucky. The things I long for are wants, not needs. I have a job, a roof over my head and food in my cupboards. So the only resolution I'm making for this year is to be kind. To help those I can help, give what I can - materially or otherwise - and to have understanding and compassion for the people around me. And I'm going to start by going easier on myself. No more guilt, no more comparing myself to others, no more self-loathing. I think if we all felt a little more worthy of love and kindness, this world would be a much better place.

Thank you so much for all of your support in 2020. I'd never have dreamed that I'd end the year as a published author (and I promise to learn to quiet the little voice in my mind that always wants to specify 'self-published'!) I wish you all strength, love, happiness, peace... and better days ahead.

Elsie x

Image courtesy of Danielle McInnes, Unsplash